Gone with the Flesh
After a close call with a zombie horde, Will and Zack form an uneasy alliance with Ernest—an intelligent zombie who retains his mind but not his hunger. With limited supplies and no clear plan, the three head deeper into the woods in search of gas, knowing the arrangement is temporary… and eventually dangerous.
We pushed through the trees until the woods thinned and a strip of asphalt came into view.
“I see a road,” I said.
Ernest stopped immediately.
“Will, I don’t do roads.”
“We’ll have to,” Zack said. “That’s civilization.”
Ernest folded his arms. “Okay, genius. If there are two guys and a zombie walking down the road, what exactly do you think people are going to assume?”
“We can hide your face,” Zack offered.
Ernest stared at him.
“You two aren’t very careful, are you?”
“We’re careful enough,” Zack said.
Ernest shook his head slowly. “There’s one more reason we’re not taking the road.”
“What?” I asked.
“It’s about half the distance through the woods.”
Zack grinned. “That’s a good enough reason, don’t you think, Will?”
“Fine. Off the road.”
We turned back into the trees.
After a few minutes, I asked, “So… what do they call you?”
Ernest sighed. “You mean what is my name?”
“Well, yeah. What’s the difference?”
“Just ask me like you would a normal person. ‘What is your name?’ Geez.”
“Okay. What is your name?”
He straightened with dignity.
“My name is Ernest VanFinkle.”
Zack burst out laughing. “That is hilarious. Is that real?”
Ernest’s eyes narrowed. “That name is real. And I have half a mind to eat you right here. I spared you two, and you mock me.”
“That’s just Zack,” I said quickly. “We’re not used to having full conversations with zombies.”
Zack put his headphones back on and started playing his zombie rap.
Ernest winced. “Please tell him to turn that off. It’s very insulting.”
The woods were not friendly
The “shortcut” turned into steep gullies, loose boulders, and climbs that made my calves scream. Ernest moved easily. Zack complained constantly.
But eventually, we saw it.
A gas station.
Still standing.
Still open.
We bought a gas can and filled it. Zack grabbed two packs of beef jerky and held one out.
“You want some?”
Ernest studied it carefully. “I’ve never tried jerky. I know I can’t eat steak.”
“Try it.”
He hesitated. “Something weird is going to happen. I can feel it.”
He took a bite.
Paused.
His eyes widened.
“Oh heck yes. I could eat this all day.”
Prefer to listen? [Listen to The Problem with Roads]
Episode 1 The Man Who Didn’t Rot (Part 2) | Episode 2 The Gas Station (Part 2)